"I challenge you to a head-to-head challenge, Steve Winwood!"
"Please don't hurt me Mr. Dio, Sir!"Look at Dio. He's on the attack! He's gonna attack you with his Rock!* Now, look at little Stevie Winwood. Laid back. Do those suspenders look like rock suspenders? Not on your life!
Say their names out loud. Dio. Dio! DIO!!! (don't be afraid to shout!) Can't you feel the majesty and the power? And now, Winwood. Winwood! WINWOOD!!! Even when you shout it, it screams wimp. Dio's name is a name meant to be shouted! Winwood's sounds like a type of orchestral musical instrument. That's no way to rock! Officially: Lame!
Dio: American! Winwood: English. USA! USA! USA!
Steve Winwood's first album with his name on the cover is a solo album, right? Well Dio named his whole damned band Dio! This wasn't no solo album. The band's name was Dio! If you were in Dio, you were in Dio! If you played on Steve Winwood's solo album, that's all you did, you played with Stevie Winwood. You weren't in Winwood, you just played with him.** And just go ahead and try to get your band to name themselves after you.***
These are some highly cogent arguments to the vast superiority of Dio over Winwood, and it's sad that in this day and age that I even had to do this, despite some admittedly strong rhyming skills of Winwuss (heh, heh). But, I'll close my argument with this:
Vs.
*I said Rock.
**I know. I know.
***I still say Wayne Bass & the Fishhooks is a great band name!
Say their names out loud. Dio. Dio! DIO!!! (don't be afraid to shout!) Can't you feel the majesty and the power? And now, Winwood. Winwood! WINWOOD!!! Even when you shout it, it screams wimp. Dio's name is a name meant to be shouted! Winwood's sounds like a type of orchestral musical instrument. That's no way to rock! Officially: Lame!
Dio: American! Winwood: English. USA! USA! USA!
Steve Winwood's first album with his name on the cover is a solo album, right? Well Dio named his whole damned band Dio! This wasn't no solo album. The band's name was Dio! If you were in Dio, you were in Dio! If you played on Steve Winwood's solo album, that's all you did, you played with Stevie Winwood. You weren't in Winwood, you just played with him.** And just go ahead and try to get your band to name themselves after you.***
These are some highly cogent arguments to the vast superiority of Dio over Winwood, and it's sad that in this day and age that I even had to do this, despite some admittedly strong rhyming skills of Winwuss (heh, heh). But, I'll close my argument with this:
Vs.
I rest my case.
*I said Rock.
**I know. I know.
***I still say Wayne Bass & the Fishhooks is a great band name!
3 comments:
dio might rock, but is he a fantastic chiropractor?
I believe it's been said that Dio "is a generator, a powerful force for action, for progress, and an enthusiastic believer in people and in their capacity to do the awesome!" So, my guess is, sure, why not?
YES!
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