¿Quién Es Más Dio?

Rex from Toy Story

O

T-Rex from Meet The Robinsons?

Get To Know: FOS

I just briefly read read some of the Citizen Nick Word Center's recent posts and realized something: he is a Voltron-like conflugration* of all of us! He likes to bike (like Josh!). He likes to paint miniatures (like Rod!). He likes cats (like Robin!). He likes to take pictures (like Shawn!). He lives in Illinois (like Wayne did!). He likes Harry Harrison (like Bob!). He doesn't like when people break any laws (like Adam!). He's a small Asian woman (like Priscilla!). And he loves** Dio (like all of us!)!

*Sniglet: not a word, but should be!
**Or, will soon!

Supermegacitizennickwordcenter!!!!!

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! often like to see our affect on the rest of the internets. With that in mind we occasionally do a google search on SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! At first, we'd get the sites to the right of the posts and a couple of Italian wrestling sites. But, today we discovered a new friend! Read his fantastic post about Dio and a strange confluence of events leading him to this very site! And I know that now that he's found out the power that Dio has over his life, he will fully give in to that power! Everything's coming up Dio? Damn right it is!

Kirby Speaks!

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! see a lot of different comic related 'memes'* floating around all the time and they run the range from stupid to funny to cool. With that in mind, when we saw this 'meme' present itself, we knew exactly what Jack would be saying today!** And of course it fits with our Dio theme week! Here it is; SUPERMEGADIO!!!!!'S first participation in a 'meme!' Prepare to hear the truth as spoken by one of comicdom's greats!

*I don't know exactly what meme actually means, but we are assured that it has nothing to do with 'meh!'
**Besides, "Let me out of this box!"***
***Man, that's an old**** joke!
****Bad one, too!*****
*****Wait, we lost track of all the footnoting.****** Oh well.
******Another bad joke.

You Are Not A Jedi Yet!

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! are always proud when anyone spreads their love of Dio to the world. With that in mind we are very pleased to see supermegamonkey's post on the possible future Guitar Hero songs. Both chime in on the need for Dio songs. That, however, should of been the first bit of analysis of the list. Good, but not great. But, don't the video game people hear the outcry of the internets? C'mon Guitar Hero people! Rainbow In The Dark! Holy Diver! We Rock! The world wants a Guitar Hero: Dio Edition! Anyway, supermegamonkey, we'll give you the Dio rock salute!

"I salute YOU, supermegamonkey!!!"

Black Sabbath's Golden Era!

A week from today, those record company bigwigs will finally address the most overlooked era in any band's history! That's right. April 2, out comes the best of Black Sabbath: The DIO Years! Some may scoff and say that this is an era best forgotten, but they'd be idiots! Some may say that Ozzy beats Dio, but they'd be morons! Some may say that a greatest hits of this era would be redundant, just sell the albums, and they'd be right! Each song a masterpiece, Dio infuses Black Sabbath with his greatness at every turn! In celebration of this event, Dio will be touring this summer with the band. Finally, Black Sabbath gets a singer who can still sing and remembers all the words!

Saturday Night Story!

So, I was out Saturday night. Among the group was a friend of mine who is an ER nurse in NYC. Another person there is currently a nursing student from UCLA. The student said to my friend* "So, NYC ER? You must see a lot of hot people!" At this point, my friend started to pinch me** to stop herself from smacking this girl! I don't know why I deserve this type of punishment...

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! must interrupt this post as we come to be told that this post is too far from our Dio roots! With that in mind, we promise only Dio specific posts the rest of the week! You read it here first!

*Not exactly these words, mind you. I wasn't sitting there with a pen and paper, but you get the point.***
**I don't know why I deserved to be hurt though.
***People are stupid!

Dio Lyrics Sunday!

Like The Beat Of The Heart
Dio

Tonight we run
We can hide in the dark
When the moon steals the light from the dying sun
Oh run
It's a better thing than we have ever done
There's a beast that lives inside you
And it's screaming to get out
Like the beat of a heart
Don't look behind
Cause a tear that never dies
Can only make you blind
You've got to try
Cause the future's never never gonna die
There's a beast that lives inside you
And it's screaming to get out
It's a storm that's never ending
It's a truth without a doubt
Tonight we run
We can hide in the dark
Till the moon steals the light from the sun
There's a beast that lives inside you
And it's screaming let me out
It's a storm that's never ending
It's a truth without a doubt
Love can be a whisper
But pain will always
Shout to you
Like the beat of a heart
Like the beat of a heart
Like the beat of a heart
Like the beat of a heart

¿Quién Es Más Dio?

Rodney P. Brady

OBenedict Arnold?

You're Smarter For Being Here!

You've all probably heard by now about the study that showed that smarter kids listen to metal. What was wildly underreported that 100% of those who love Dio get perfect scores on their SAT's. It's science!

I liked this quote from MTV's reporting of this.

"Still, it's rather hard to imagine Albert Einstein or Stephen Hawking rockin' out to Opeth."

It might be rude of me to say, but isn't it hard to imagine Stephen Hawking 'rockin' out' to anything?*

*Except Dio.

Why?

It looks like we've been called out here on SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! That must mean only one thing! It's time for a head-to-head challenge, Mr. Brady!

"This little one will be no problem!"

"Not like this!"

Rod Brady claims to be in a band. Two even. But, has he ever played out with either of these bands? We think not. Dio has sold out stadiums! He's no wuss!

Look how red Rod Brady is! Look it! Don't advert your eyes! It's blinding! Dio only blinds you with his awesomeness!

Rod Brady not only reads comics, he stores them in the order that they take place! That's some serious nerd-ness there! Dio may be a nerd, but he's not that obsessive about it!

Rod likes D&D. Dio likes D&D imagery. Ok, they're tied here, I guess.

Dio played with Black Sabbath! Black Sabbath!!! BLACK SABBATH!!!!! Rod could've played with Zach Wylde, one time, if he hadn't overslept!

Rod writes songs and then usually names them after food. Dio rocks about demons and stuff!

Rodney Patrick Brady was named after his dad or something. Dio named himself! And he named himself Dio!

Rodney works for the man and daydreams about rocking and comics! Dio works for no man, but himself!

Rodney's greatest achievement in life is this very post! Dio has post's like this written about him everyday!

This one wasn't even close!

Supermegascolding! II

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! don't feel that the last post's scolding was clear enough. With that in mind, we present this new and improved scolding:

DON'T PRETEND TO LOVE DIO!!!!! REALLY LOVE HIM!!!!!

Supermegascolding!

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! feel that some of you only pretend to love Dio! With that in mind, we offer this scolding:

DON'T PRETEND TO LOVE DIO!!!!!

Untold Tale Now To Be Told!

Marvel has announced a new four issue mini-series starting in June. Here's the cover for the first issue. That's right! It's the secret untold story of Battlin' Jack Murdock's, Daredevil's father, decision to not throw his last fight! This story has been too long in coming. We, the loyal fans of comics NEEDED this story decades ago. Thankfully, now we have it!

Fifteen!*

Here, it is, finally! The post you've all been waiting for! Our magnum opus on the great tv show: Fifteen! What kind of show could possibly generate this much excitement? Well, I'll tell ya'!

We interupt this post to bring you some breaking news! In doing our research for this post, we have learned some important news! The character of Billy, one of the main characters, and a bigger dork I don't know of, was played by Ryan Reynolds, Van Wilder himself!** It all makes sense! We now return to our regularly scheduled post.

Fifteen was a half-hour teen 'soap opera' from Canada! Doesn't that just scream 'awful?' Well it should because it was! It was, like all other great shows from the great white North, aired on Nickelodeon. It first appeared my Sophmore year in high school when I was fifteen! And, surprisingly, I was way, way cooler than any character on this show.***

This show had all the hallmarks of great drama: over-acting, badly constructed sets, and mild Canadian accents. The kids all had minor relationship drama, but, of course always acted like it was the end of the world! And, for some reason, a lot stuff happened in the stairwell, which, of course, looked nothing like any school stairwell I'd ever seen!****

And the musical breaks! Also, overdramatic! The camera would pause on a character just after something in his life was threatening to be changed for ever, and than this cheesey synth music would start and play for a good half-minute!

But, here's the worst part. This show started almost exactly when Beverly Hills, 90210 started. Not only that, they both introduced tough, bad boy characters in leather named Dylan! I didn't watch 90210 at the time, but every girl in my high school must have. So, there I was, nerd-extradoinaire, and I overhear several girls discuss how cute the new character Dylan was! Could these girls actually be watching Fifteen? And find that Dylan guy cute? Of course not, you dolt! They were talking about Luke Perry! Noone else on Earth watched Fifteen!

Here's a brief clip I found on the internets. This is all you really need to see in order to understand the deal with this show. But, just in case, here's a full episode!*****

*I honestly don't have a lot of faith in this post. But, I've been promising you Fifteen, so here it is.
**If it helps, he was Hannibal King in Blade Trinity.
***Really!
****Must be different in Canada.
*****I couldn't watch the whole thing.

Dio Lyrics Sunday!

This one speaks for itself*

Rainbow In The Dark
Dio

When there's lightning-it always bring me down
Cause it's free and I see that it's me
Who's lost and never found
I cry for magic-I feel it dancing in the light
But it was cold-I lost my hold
To the shadows of the night

There's no sign of the morning coming
You've been left on your own
Like a Rainbow in the Dark

Do your demons-do they ever let you go
When you've tried-do they hide-deep inside
Is it someone that you know
You're a picture-just an image caught in time
We're a lie-you and I
We're words without a rhyme

There's no sign of the morning coming
You've been left on your own
Like a Rainbow in the Dark

When there's lightning-it always brings me down
Cause it's free and I see that it's me
Who's lost and never found
Feel the magic-feel it dancing in the air
But it's fear-and you'll hear
It calling you beware

There's no sign of the morning coming
There's no sight of the day
You've been left on your own
Like a Rainbow in the Dark

*Except for this introduction!

¿Quién Es Más Dio?

John Byrne

O

John Byrne?

Universal Health Care?

As a part of the changes made to Medicare by the Bush administration and drug companies, Congress legislated a study to be enacted to find out what Americans expected/wanted as far as health care. While some in the liberal media were skeptical of the intents of this Republican created study, what they came back with was that Americans, for the most part, want a universal health care system. The Citizens Health Care Working Group formally filed their report at the end of last year. Only one of the five committees required by LAW to hold a hearing on the results of this report has even scheduled such a hearing. The Bush administration has at the very least ignored it, or out and out rejected it. Yay, democracy!

I heard about this on the Rachel Maddow Show on Air America Radio.

See, I can talk about serious stuff, too! Fifteen on Monday!

I Can Remember Some Things!

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! have received many comments alluding to the fact that we had to look up what SCUBA stood for in the footnote to this post! Nothing could be further from the truth! This bit of info was actually imprinted on our minds at a young age due to a 1980's sitcom! Who says TV doesn't learn ya'?

What To Talk About Next?

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! often feel we owe it to our audience to maintain a high level of quality in each post.* Sometimes, however, it is difficult to even think of a post each day.** We have a back log of post's that are just itchin' to be written! With that (and our love of democracy) in mind, we leave it to you to decide what the next subject should be: the old TV show Fifteen or a comic book review. We also apparently need to do a head-to-head challenge with Kenny Rogers now, though this can wait 'til next week. One a week is unfair to all these poor schmoes that Shawn seems to like!*** We could also do another Get To Know! You decide!

*Just like Dio!
**This one counts!
***Just curious, is there insanity in your family?

...A Slave?

So, you know how Adam* would go on and on about wanting a button to press whenever he wanted anything and it would just appear? Well, it seems at my Grandma's new 'Assisted Living' place, she gets just such a button! Plus, the place is right behind Jersey Freeze! Adam, your future is now!

*Official SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! title pending.

My Picture

It has been suggested that the photo identifying myself is offensive. With that in mind, we call for another vote! That's right, Democracy is on the march here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! So, all in favor of the picture, say so!

The End Of The Innocence!!!!!

Oh, man! Don Henley? Really? Oh, what fools these mortals be! What kind of crack are you smoking?* Have you learned anything? It looks like it's time for another head-to-head challenge! It...is...ON!

"Try not to wet your pants, Henley!"

"Too late."

Dio was in the greatest hard rock band of all time: Dio. Henley was in the Eagles. The EAGLES, fer crissakes! The worst band of all time! Everytime we hear that "Hotel California" start up, we pray that there's a God so that He will go back in time and prevent this song from ever being written!*** Downright awful. I shouldn't have to even go on, but I will!

You see that picture of him, pensively chewing on his glasses? This is a rocker to you? Maybe if I drove a Volvo! But, I don't!**** So that's not a rocker!

Don Henley used to play in a country band with Kenny Rogers! Kenny Rogers is the epitome of all that is wrong in music today! Dio used to play in a blues based, Tolkien inspired band in the sixties! Blues vs. Country, I know that this might be a tough one if you had never heard music before. But, since I know you have, we all know the answer!

Dio sings about mythological beasts and S.C.U.B.A.***** diving priests! Henley likes to sing about little boys in summer. He likes to see them in shorts, I guess. Pervert!

Don Henley had a song making fun of him recorded by a great band. What'd he do? He wound up on stage singing with them. Ok, we admit that's cool and give him his props! But, Dio had a song written about him and he appeared on the band's next album and in their movie! That totally blows Henley out of the water!

Dio's greatest hits album: The Very Beast of Dio. That's 'Beast,' not 'Best.' That ain't no typo! Nothing could rock harder than that! Don Henley: Actual Miles. Actual Miles? Aren't 'actual miles' less than what's advertised? He admits up front that his song's are less than good! Rocks harder: Dio!

So, there you have it. Another head-to-head challenge which clearly shows the greatness that is Dio! You can keep saying you like Don Henley if you like perverted, raspy-voiced, country music!

*The strong kind it would seem.
**Do not read this footnote!
***Further proof of God's non-existence!
****I drive a Nissan Sentra!
*****Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus

New Band Name?

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! believe in democracy! And not that represenational form of democracy the US government uses! We believe in true democracy. With that in mind we pose the questions to you our loyal readers and Dio fans!

We are members of the great band The Politburo. It has been suggested that there might be a better band name out there. So, we ask you: The Politburo or The Submarineheads?

You decide!

Nintendo Wii, Playstation 3, Or Xbox 360?

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! have carefully avoided entering the 'great video game system debate' for many reasons. The primary reason is that the greatest video game ever has already been made and played (often!) and there really is no reason to ever make another video game let alone new systems to play them on. Plus, we really don't care for video games!

With that in mind, we now present to you the definitive ruling on which is the greatest of the three new video game consoles: Nintendo Wii, Playstation 3, or Xbox 360.

Really, this is no contest. There is only one system which truly revolutionizes what a video game is. Remember, how Dave would drag you to the arcade and make you watch some lame 3-D game and he would go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about how this was the future of video games, and you were like, "I don't care, let's go to the comic store!" God-Damn. God. Damn.

Anyway, he was wrong. And Dragonslayer didn't revolutionize video gaming either in case you were wondering. No, the true answer lies in the Nintendo Wii!

This thing is fun! Period! (Well, exclamation marks, really). We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! had the distinct pleasure of playing some Wii this weekend. There's a high level of interactivity that you don't get in traditional, non-Legend of Zelda: A Link To the Past (or its Gameboy sequel) games. You really have to get up off of your butt and play! We played a sports game containing bowling, baseball, tennis, golf, and boxing and some Zelda! Yup, Zelda! I would play this Zelda game!

You've seen the commercials of the two ninjas* driving up in their little car to bring fun to the perpetually surprised people**. And they look like dorks jumping around and flipping the remotes and such. Well, they may look like dorks, but they clearly had fun!

Well, isn't this what Guitar Hero does? Isn't that interactive? Man, you couldn't be more wrong! I've never heard a dumber question in my life! Let's face it, Guitar Hero is lame!*** I know that, and I barely played it. The Wii follows your movements and allows you to beat up on Bob! Let me repeat that, you can beat up on Bob! (Ok, he won the second fight).

If you want me to play video games, the answer is simple. Get a Wii! That's what Dio would do!

*If I learned anything from Frank Miller, it's all Asians are ninjas!
**That one's for you Priscilla!
***And no Dio!

Dio Lyrics Sunday!: Special Edition

Why 'Special Edition'? Because, this week instead of lyrics BY Dio, we're presenting lyrics ABOUT Dio! That's right it's

Dio
Tenacious D

Dio has rocked (rocked) for a long, long time.
But, now it's time for him to pass the torch!
He has songs of wildebeests and angels;
He has soared on the wings of demon!

It's time to pass the torch,
You're too old to rock,
No more rockin' for you!
We're takin' you to a home,
But, we will sing a song about you!

And, we will make sure that you're very well taken care of.
You'll tell us secrets that you've learned. RAOW!

Your sauce will mix with ours,
And we'll make a good goulash, baby!
Dio, time to go!
You will pass your cape and scepter TO ME!
And a smaller one for KG.
Go! Go! Dio! Dio!

¿Quién Es Más Dio?

Christopher Walken

O

Steve Buscemi?

Some News Links-Dio Style!

We know we don't have the poetry of Dio quite down yet, but we're working on it! (Needs more chimeras, right?)

You...are...a hypocrite!
You...lie...in the sky,
Above crimson tides!
Rock on!

Holy classes,
Don't belong in public schools!
Holy classes,
Stubborn as mules!

Hidden among the elms
An unheard tale
Of bushes giving in!
Hope they'll do it again!

I Can't Come Up With A Clever Title That's Not A Spoiler!

This is a conservative's opinion on yesterday's Marvel Comics related news. It's quite funny, in the people are crazy and don't really get it vein. Again, I'd go into more details, but I don't know how to hide spoilers and I don't know if everyone knows this info yet.

And the spoiler will be the subject of the Wørd on the Colbert Report tonight, so avoid that show, too.

I got all this from Newsarama. Oh, and the links have spoilers.

Dio And Me!

It may seem to many of you that I have always loved Dio. But, no, this is not true! It took me many years of personal and professional growth to be able to truly appreciate the greatness that is Dio! I once lamented the fact that I have not always realized how great he truly is, but a man said to me, "Now was the right time for you to appreciate Dio!" Or something like that.

So, what made me go from wincing whenever a Dio video or song came on to anticipating such an event? While the answer is really a heroic journey since my youth, one special piece of the puzzle is Tenacious D.

Now, I love me some Tenacious D. I find their music good, and their humor, well, humorous. (This is not really a post about Tenacious D, but I find them mocking just about everything on every level with their humor). On their first album, they have a song entitled Dio, which is about Dio passing on his musical greatness to The D, now that he's old and can't rock anymore. I hated this song, and would often pass over it on the cd. I didn't like the lyrics, the music, or the joke. And Dio sucked! (or so I then thought).

Since that time, I would often see Dio videos on VH1 Classic (the only place to see videos on tv), and slowly grow to appreciate his dramatic flair. But, still, I did not care for the man or his music.

Tenacious D then released an album soundtrack to their movie The Pick Of Destiny. On the first track, Meatloaf, the supposedly great, bombastic singer sings a verse or two and he absolutely bites! He sounds like an old, tired man who couldn't sing without several hits of oxygen. Then, a verse or two later on comes RJ himself, playing, as only he could, himself! The lyrics are tricky, and the song is good, and Dio sings fantastically! The lyrics are well understood, but fast and with high quality. I was overwhelmed with just how good this man could still sing. It was amazing especially compared to the waste that was Meatloaf! I listened to this verse several times to really get a feel for the man's talent.

And ever since, I've know that Ronnie James Dio is the only true Rock God!

Marvel Spoiled It Again

I know that we all talked about this on e-mail, but I figured I'd put some of my rage here anyway. You'll just have to wait for my great post on the show Fifteen.

For those who don't know, Marvel Comics leaked a major plot point to the press before any store even opened to sell the book. Anyway, my comic shop guy was pissed that Marvel leaked the news to the papers without giving retailers a heads up so that they could order more. Marvel also didn't overprint the issue so that they could quickly send out more. So, my question is why go to the press? While this may bring customers into stores, they're not buying anything else. Plus, they can't get Civil War level sales on this book, because they didn't print that many. Even if they go to a reprint, it won't be out for two weeks and then the mainstream will most likely have lost interest.

I just read the issue in question (not on the toilet)! This issue alone is not going to make a collector out of a non-collector. Trust me.

I'd put my opinion on the actual content, but I don't want to spoil anything for anyone.

Get To Know: Rock Gods!

Ritchie Blackmore

If all Ritchie Blackmore did was found Rainbow and have the foresight to allow the greatness which is Dio flow, he would have earned his status as a Rock God. But, no, he also formed Deep Purple! Who is Deep Purple? They had a little song called Smoke On The Water, maybe you've heard of it? Any song that has lyrics about Frank Zappa, and still becomes a worldwide hit, is a pretty good song. Plus, that riff is unforgettable:

Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh!

See, unforgetable!

He's also a great guitarist! Seems like his old man threatened him with regular beatings with his guitar if he didn't learn that guitar.* I think that's what he's about to do in this picture. Don't cross Blackmore, or he'll use his deadly GUITAR ATTACK!

Nowadays, Blackmore took a lesson from Dio himself, and started a band with his name in it**, Blackmore's Night! They probably rock as only an ex-associate of Dio can!

That's really all I know about Ritchie Blackmore, so I'll talk more about Dio! Dio's real name isn't Dio! It's Ronald James Padavona! Can you believe it? His real name is almost as cool as Dio.*** Padavona. That's a pretty name! But, nothing hits you as hard as DIO!

*Take that B.F. Skinner!
**I know Rainbow was originally Ritchie Blackmore's Rainbow, but that had to change once the public got a full dose of Dio!
***I said, almost.

I'm Sorry, So Sorry...

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! have had an impeccable run of (at least) a post a day. With that in mind, we apologize for not having a post today. Dio wouldn't approve!

Dio Lyrics Sunday!

Notice the fantastic imagery and how, within just the first verse, Dio has connected three completely random concepts! The mind boggles!

Lock Up The Wolves
Dio

In the houses of the holy
To the middle of the mystic sea
At the cradle of the world

There's a black cat screaming
And it's not even midnight, no
At the cradle of the world

They're screaming for sanctuary
They're screaming at you
Lock up the wolves
Lock up the wolves, yeah, yeah, yeah

Now there's a cloud over heaven
And a pain out of paradise
In your corner of the world
Turn your back on the children
Does it feel like it's colder
In your corner of the world

They're screaming for sanctuary
They're screaming at you
Lock up the wolves
Lock up the wolves,...

Don't you let'em get away
Lock up the wolves before you play
Or it's over
Lock up the wolves
Don't you let'em get away
Don't you let'em get away

There's no back door to heaven
Just a front door to hell, oh
In this corner of the world

Now if you turn your back on the children
Don't you feel it getting colder
In your corner of the world

They're screaming for sanctuary
They're screaming at you
Lock up the wolves
Lock up the wolves,...

¿Quién Es Más Dio?

The one you've been waiting for...

Fernando Lamas

O

Ricardo Montalbán?

Civil Dio!!!!! II

I couldn't find a good version of the 'Cap beating Iron Man' version of this cover on-line.

À La Carte Or Prix Fixe?

We here at SUPERMEGADIO!!!!! get the feeling that you were underwhelmed by our Civil Dio!!!!! picture after being blown away so forcefully by the World War Dio!!!!! picture. With that in mind, we have prepared an even greater picture for Civil Dio!!!!! to premiere tomorrow that will surely disintegrate your mind into pieces so small that ants will come by and eat them! Prepare your minds to be eaten!